There are too many movies about the apocalypse for it not to be rapidly approaching, right? Might as well cultivate that green thumb now, so you can grow your own food after doomsday. Below, our top gardening tools to have on hand when the end is nigh (and even when it isn’t).
> French Antique Tools: Ready to rake the earth, clobber an assailant or be brandished overhead in a burbling rage, this group of genuine antique gardening tools on Etsy is a must-have for survivors who appreciate historical accuracy (and like to recycle).
> PC Kale Bowl: You know what a disaster is in our books? No kale. Stave off iron-deficiency and the utter desolation of a smoothie that’s any colour besides green with this easy-peasy grow-your-own-kale bowl ($10 at Loblaw garden centres).
> Emergency Seed Survival Kit: "Are you unsure of the future? Are you concerned with our depleting food supply? Are you looking to have a safety net in the event of a food crises?" If your answer is a resounding "Heck, yes!" this kit of 5,000 heirloom seeds on Etsy should provide some peace of mind.
> Strathcona 1980 Zombie Apocalypse Survival Seeds: Fight the undead with vegetables! This kit, from Vancouver’s Strathcona Seeds ($42) suggests, "Plant Black Spanish Radishes at the heads of graves of emerging zombies. Radishes blind them by growing into their eye sockets. The roots eventually invade the zombie’s brain and render them immobile." Makes sense to us.
> PC Moisture Lock Premium Potting Soil: Water is a precious resource, and this soil is formulated to retain it. Plus, the 30L bags are great for constructing protective barriers ($8.99, President’s Choice).
> Scotts Miracle-Gro Flower Magic: This mix of 26 floral varieties come in vivid rainbow hues and are incredibly easy to grow. No digging or sowing required; just sprinkle the mix directly onto the ground in a large "SOS" shape and you’ll have a rescue signal that’s gorgeous, fragrant and visible from afar all season long.
Just your garden-variety post-Day of Reckoning plot. —Adrienne Matei
Enter to win! We’re giving away two (2) $100 gift cards to Superstore to help get your garden growing. Here’s how to enter:
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