How to Design Your Dream Life in 5 Easy Steps

Ever thought about life design? That is, designing your life so that it matches … you guessed it, YOU? It makes a lot of sense and, yet, so many of us are living our lives based on other people’s expectations—what we thought we were supposed to do—and are conforming to social norms. Well, it’s time to get "unstuck" and access the freedom to be exactly who you are (read: designing your dream life) through the following five easy steps:

step 1: accept where you are. Before you can do anything, you must accept your current situation. Every single choice you’ve made has led you here, and you must trust that this is OK. You may not love where you are (our job, relationships, health status, location, home, etc.) but there’s absolutely nothing you can do to change your past. So breathe in, accept where you are, and now you can move forward.

step 2: visualize where you want to be. You can’t move forward if you don’t know where you want to go. So be sure to get clear on what you want, before you make any drastic changes. Hint: this is more about who you want to be, opposed to what you want to do. Remember, you’re a human being not a human doing. Try this! Picture yourself two years from now, living your best life (with no limitations). How do you greet the people you meet? Who are you with? What’s most important to you? What’s making you smile? Answering these questions will help you get a clear vision of the life you want.

step 3: identify the gaps. What did you see in your vision that’s missing from your life today? It may help to break your life into the following segments, to ensure that you don’t miss anything: Career/Business, Romance/Significant Other, Health/Fitness, Personal Growth/Learning, Family/Friends. Doing this will show you the gaps between your current and ideal life, so you can draw a map to where you want go.

step 4: declare what you want. Based on what’s missing from your life today, what will you choose to focus on? Try making three bold statements about what you want to create, followed by three actions that you’ll take to make your declarations a reality. For example: declaration: “I will meet the man that I’ll marry next year”; action: “I will create a profile on a dating site.” Or: declaration: “I will secure three dream clients in the next two months"; action: “I’ll spend two hours going to an industry networking event next Friday.”

step 5: manifest your dreams into reality. After you’ve identified what needs to change, and you’ve taken action to make it happen, you can release and surrender and leave room for serendipity to happen. Imagine all the declarations you made have already happened and think about them as if you’re experiencing them now. Try using, “I am …” statements to solidify your belief in yourself. This is where trust comes in and knowing that you deserve a life you love. Keep your vibrations high and let go of any resistance—you’ll attract what you put out!

So what could life design mean for you? To everyone, it’s different. But for those who pursue it, it’s ultimately about being who you are, and finally claiming your dream life. No matter your situation, you have the power to change your life. So, what’s ONE thing you will do today to start designing your life? —Tonia Mattu

Tonia Mattu is a certified life coach, author, founder of YUOLOGY, and creator of YuSchool: a six-week life design framework that teaches confidence and clarity in service of building a dream life. Read her full personal story (trust us, it’s incredible!), download her free Crash Course in Confidence or take advantage of a special summer registration price of just $99 per month for her game-changing six-week YuSchool course now! Learn much, much more at yuology.com.

This article was originally published in Fresh magazine.