Always Have An Ace On Hand

What do you do when you find yourself, surrounded by Kevin Heart, Cristiano Ronaldo, and Daniel Negreanu, without any more gambling jokes to tell? What if you just want to be the funniest person at the table? If so, you’ve come to the right place as we’ve compiled a great assortment of funniest gambling jokes! It is not fair to let Mr. Heart be the only comedian at the table! And if you are new to the world of gambling you should definitely read more about free spins on Canadian casinos before learning the jokes.

Key Points:

• Laugh your way through one-liners about gambling
• Gambling jokes with questions and answers

Laugh your way through one-liners about gambling

We’ll start our blog post with a couple of easy-to-use gambling jokes and one-liners for your entertainment. There is no doubt that one-liner jokes make for some of the best humor. No build-up is necessary and you can say them whenever you want.

There is nothing better than a one-liner gambling joke to pick up a conversation on any subject, regardless of whether you are talking at work, at the poker table, in the kitchen, or on the live chat of any of the best online casinos in the UK. The following are our top picks:

1. It was asked of me the other night that I leave the casino. It was said that I had a chip on my shoulder.
2. The poker night I’m attending is themed after ABBA. Winner takes all.
3. While walking down the street earlier this morning, I tripped over a betting shop sign. What are the odds of that happening?
4. Each year, I wager with a local farmer on the lamb that will jump the highest. Gambols are my favorite.
5. There was a horse I bet on at 10-1. I didn’t get it until half-past three.
6. At the zoo, I lost money wagering on one of the big cats. He was probably a cheetah.
7. The boat I bought was a gamble that I took without looking at it first. This was a punt.
8. It was a good night at strip poker for me the other night. Playing my socks off was a blast for me.
9. Recently, I wagered on a giraffe race. My entry came in second. The game was decided by a neck. It wasn’t even close.
10. There was a midget chef who had to leave his job at a casino. The steaks were too high.

Gambling jokes with questions and answers

Our one-liner jokes about gambling are sure to entertain you. We personally enjoyed gathering them. Imagine this scenario: a few days ago, you played at an online casino and now you want to check out a brick-and-mortar casino.

Upon entering a licensed and trusted operator’s facility, you gather around a roulette table to place your bets. You see players of all kinds there- some talkative, others not so much. In an effort to avoid spending your game time in silence, you approach a player with the opposite appearance as that school bully who would eat your lunch. Is there anything you would do to break the ice?

We guarantee that if you start your talk with a gambling joke, you will be the stand-up comedian in the room. Listeners get much more engaged when question-and-answer jokes are spoken in the right tone and with the right pauses. 

1. Can you tell me why large maps are useless for playing poker? In the end, they always fold.
2. The dietician was kicked out of the casino for what reason? There was an incident in which he counted carbs.
3. Were you aware that they arrested a T-Rex after he was hired by a casino? It turned out that he was a small arms dealer.
4. What’s the name of a penthouse casino where a couple of cows are playing poker? High Steaks.
5. A casino-running iguana is called what? It’s the lizard of odds.
6. Can you tell me why Africa doesn’t have any casinos? The number of cheetahs is too high.
7. What was the name of the daughter of the gambling addicts? Betty