The Mom Flow: What Happens When The Girl Who Has It Together … Doesn’t

Welcome to The Mom Flow, where I share things that are on my mind in the hopes of helping you connect to your Mom Flow. Thanks for being here! —Erin Sousa

I’ve been in a rut. Not in every area of life, but enough that the heaviness was hard to ignore. I’ve hinted at it here and there – the vibe has just felt… off. More resistance, less ease. It’s always funny when you’re always the one who has it all ‘together’. You almost feel guilty for announcing that things aren’t going well, like you’ve failed.

So, to cope, I started saying I’m in my micro-win era – because honestly? Some days the only thing keeping me going was a tiny sliver of good news, a hot coffee I didn’t forget about, enjoying a stroll around Homesense, a good voice note sesh with a girlfriend.

Enter a shift.

I’ve been channeling my energy into what I can control: mom life, health goals, and showing up for the parts of work I still love, even on the messy days. Meanwhile, our home was a whole other saga – deficiency issues a year in, surprise repairs (our washer, dishwasher, leaks to name a few?!), all the joy (and chaos) of adulthood. Work? Also a mixed bag: endless moving parts, big feelings, slow market, and more no’s than yes’s. My health was in a bad spot and I felt a bit stuck. Honestly, my confidence was really shaken with everything and it wasn’t serving me at all.

But lately… I can feel a shift. A sense of momentum again.

• Our bedroom closets got a glow-up.
• Some very cool biz opportunities are bubbling up.
• My health is improving and I feel like it’s just going to keep the momentum.
• And my sister moved closer, which has been beyond exciting and such a huge shift for our family dynamic.

There’s more to share soon about big changes in our fam, but for now, I’m just taking a deep breath and enjoying the good.

The shift into a new era feels very real right now – and I’d be lying if I said it’s been all ease and confidence. Growth, for me, often shows up hand-in-hand with worry. Letting go of old habits and ways of being feels like grieving a version of myself I relied on for a long time. In my forties, the stakes just feel… heavier. More permanent. Like there’s less room to mess up, even though I know that’s not really true.

And yet – in these quiet, mundane moments – I feel an overwhelming sense of gratitude. Sometimes it hits me when I’m just parking the car and walking into my home: this is the life I once dreamed of. It still catches me off guard. The peace, the normalcy, the fact that I made it here. I hold onto that feeling as tightly as I can.

If you’re in a hard season right now, I see you. I really do. And here are a few things that have helped me hold it together – and move forward – when everything felt (feels!) up in the air:

️The “what ifs” are loud – but they don’t get to run the show. Stress is real, but so is your resilience.

️Perfection is a myth. The more I chase it, the worse I feel. Done is better. Good is enough.

Compartmentalizing can be a survival skill. Not everything will feel great at once – and letting one tough area bleed into everything else? Not helpful.

Rejection isn’t a character flaw. If I let every “no” shake my confidence, I’d be curled up in a ball somewhere. Taking the ‘it’s them not you’ approach is self preservation. Protect your peace and keep it moving.

Pivoting is brave. Choosing the unknown – especially when the known is “fine” – takes major courage. But if your track record says you always find a way, trust that. This time isn’t any different.

Things get worse before they get better. A shift can get super messy while in progress but that’s the process.

Pull up. Something I’ve always done is focusing on helping others when I’m down. It always makes me feel useful.

There’s more! Keep reading this week’s edition of The Mom Flow by Erin Sousa; subscribe for free to receive new posts and support her work, here!