In a world obsessed with productivity, control, and constant striving, many women are feeling disconnected—not just from each other, but from themselves. In The Feminine Frequency, integrative medicine practitioner and author Chelsea Ann challenges the idea that success requires women to override their nature, arguing instead that intuition, embodiment, and emotional wisdom are essential—not optional.
Blending Western medicine, spiritual insight, and real-life stories from women around the world, Chelsea Ann invites us to rethink what feminine power actually looks like today—and why reclaiming it may be one of the most important acts of healing of our time. —Noa Nichol
You argue that the greatest crisis we’re facing isn’t political or environmental, but a loss of feminine nature itself. What does that loss look like in everyday life—and how do women feel it in their bodies, relationships, and choices?
“Changing a woman back into her nature is like
making the modern woman a different species altogether.”
Right now, if you are like most women, you are likely looking to find yourself through the success and accomplishments of the outside world: climbing that never-ending staircase while also looking for the door that will finally lead you to a feeling of true worthiness and love. A life based on what you accomplish is a life based on feeling you are not enough.
You may be in a constant state of evaluating your traits based on a comparison made to the outside world. When you feel this lack within—and believe that a relationship, new home, better body, travel, a baby, or career will fulfill you—you are out of your nature as a woman. The beliefs that society has created (and that you believe) around success, power, and worth have made you act like a man. This is the true cause of your unease: you are not being authentic to your nature.
Underneath all this searching for fulfillment, which is based on challenge and competition, you are just looking to return to your femininity. In my books, The Feminine Effect and The Feminine Frequency, I will show you what it means to return to your original nature as a woman. You will see all the outside identities you must lose to get there. I hope you will begin to feel an unwavering worthiness within you, which is linked to an unbreakable bond to the Source that created you. If you do not have this relationship—the commitment to yourself and God—you will maintain a confidence based on the fluctuating lies and opinions created by society. You must be able to shift the present view of your identity from outside accomplishments based on lack, to an internal knowing of your worth as a unique feminine creation.
Women are competing to become like men and when they do this, they create more greed, corruption, and economic value in the world. When both men and women are constantly working and doing, the world’s wealth and production grow at a faster rate. Just because this has become the new normal doesn’t mean that it is the right thing to do. The ones that are losing in the end are the women and children because there is no balance between being and doing, between heart and mind, between rest and action. Balance is what families need. Women have been taught to compete and to achieve the same level as men; they do not see that they are denying their innate power, which is much different than the power that a man offers.
To make a comparison in terms of evolution, let’s take something as simple as an apple tree. If you introduce an environmental disaster to the apple tree, its apples must adapt to the new environment. Their color and taste shift and the tree may not produce any apples at some point. Human functioning is not all that different and since women produce the children, their nature can be directly compared to that of an apple tree. We have shifted from our original way of being and living and we call this evolution. If the apple tree, however, lost its ability to produce apples, or the apples were altered and tasted bad, we would call that a natural disaster. We do not see our current situation as a disaster though, but I am going to show you that in fact it is.
For many readers, “the feminine” can feel abstract or even loaded. How do you define feminine nature in a grounded, practical way—separate from stereotypes, trends, or performance?
Here is a simple way to define feminine energy:
“It is different for every culture and every person, but generally she would be a woman that always rides above the clouds. They know better, they are connected to their heart, they are not sucked in by their environment in any way. They cherish their maternal needs. The most desirable need and goal is not mental. It is having a situation to share love. Which often comes through having a child or many children. It comes through their family. They are connected to their nature, know their nature, and take effort to fulfill their needs. These women eliminate any situation that does not support their nature. Any situation that wouldn’t be within their desired goals.”
And … here is a more abstract version of feminine energy for those that are eager to learn more:
All the female species contribute to the female energy. All the male species contribute to the male energy. We have both of them in us. A male directly connects to male energy but does not have access to female energy directly. Females can directly connect to both. Males receive the female energy from collective females. What is happening now is we have made every female into a male. If the female human species is disconnected from their own energy, this is a natural disaster. Let’s go back to our apple tree that I mentioned above. If that tree was unable to produce fruit, or if its apples were rotting on the branches but was still standing with all of its leaves, would you say it was healthy? Most women are not producing healthy fruit when it comes to both their frequency and generational legacy.
Your book suggests that competing within masculine systems has created deep imbalance for women. What are some subtle ways this shows up that women may not immediately recognize as conditioning?
What makes us comfortable is what is aligned with our conditioning and childhood. To find the truth, you have to be shocked and become very uncomfortable through a new perspective. Every event in your life—every new person that you meet—provides a possibility for you to question your belief systems and accept a new reality. It is not easy. These types of changes either require that you begin to live more in isolation, away from the groups that confirm your reality, or go through a personal or global radical and revolutionary shift. One very common societal conditioning is around the definition of money, power, and success. This has a cascade effect on families and specifically motherhood (making women feel that being a stay-at-home mother is not enough).
Extreme ambition, the need to conquer, acquire, compete, survive, fight, and protect are male characteristics. When women decided that equality meant going into competition to be equal to men (men having defined competition as success within society), we made ourselves physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually unstable. Greed and competition go against the feminine nature. For women to gain independence, they had to become financially independent to survive in a greedy society. The desire for independence as a woman is now forever linked to the need to make money to be successful. This is true for every generation, and even if that generation has enough financially, more is always better. In the book, The Feminine Frequency, I show you that a truly independent woman is independent from what society wants of her and independent of what others think of her. She is authentic to her nature.
Recognize your Conditioning
Conditioning comes from your family; the behaviors, reactions, emotions and mental thoughts are passed down through generations, and unless you change, you will be like them. . Childhood conditioning is one of the most difficult things to change because anything that challenges your conditioning feels uncomfortable and people generally choose the feeling of comfort over change. Conditioning is a part of our personality, but not a part of our nature. As you let go of the mental and emotional aspects you have taken on throughout your life, you will begin to become simpler. You become authentic to your soul and nature. When this happens, you require less to be happy, and you go with the flow of life—living in simplicity without many needs
So how do you change your conditioning? First you have to know yourself. Find a common pattern in the way you judge things. Be open to your friends and ask them what your conditioning is and allow it not to be a disability. Know that you are in a wheelchair, know how to use it, and still be functioning. The more you try to decondition yourself, the more you take charge of it, that means the conditioning becomes stronger. Let yourself out of everything, accept your judgment. Accept that you want to control. Each time you do it, you realize you are doing it, and you step back. Then when it happens again, you take another step back. Each time you learn and take a step back
You’ve spoken with women from vastly different cultures. What surprised you most about the shared struggles—or shared wisdom—you found across borders?
I interviewed Raouiaa, a twenty-three-year-old from Morocco. After explaining what I was writing about in The Feminine Frequency, I asked about the difference between her mother’s generation and hers. She said, “My mom was working and then got married. Everything she does now is focused on taking care of her small family and the big family (her mother, her sisters, her extended family). But they do not live together. If she wants to work, she can, but for a lot of women in Morocco they cannot. It really depends on if the man allows them to work. Seventy percent of Moroccan men do mind women working and 30 percent do not.”
I asked Raouiaa to tell me more about her generation and how women view the family structure. She said, “In my generation, we can work, we think about the future and independence, but men have problems with that. The young men think like their parents, and they do not want women to work. This affects the number of children women have; now they have one or two children or give them to their parents to raise so they can work. Before, they had many children—around eight. The new generation has copied the Western culture because of Hollywood and Instagram.”
“Do you see these changes happening in real time with your own eyes?”
“Oh yes! In earlier times in Morocco, there were no women fighting with their husbands in the streets. Now, there are. You can see this while sitting in a coffee shop. Women want to prove a point, saying I can do that myself! You can see that women are more selfish now.”
“How has the morality within women changed because of this?”
“We do not have good morality anymore, but my mom does. My mom is more virtuous because she had less to do—she had less stress. She was not in survival. My dad did everything, so she was following the traditional role of men and women. The women here do not want to be “angels” like their mothers because they think of that as powerless. They want power, so they get married, and they have children and then they have a divorce, because they feel more powerful than their husbands. Their relationships cannot survive because they want to be in control. The statistic of divorce in my city is now seven cases of divorce every day, and I live in a small city. I don’t trust women anymore: I don’t have many friends now.”
Morocco is a fascinating example because of how fast the shift in culture and the family unit has occurred as a result of social media. In America, this shift took generations, and it was difficult to pinpoint the changes that took place and how women’s personalities were affected as it was happening. We can see it through their children, though. In Morocco, from what I understood from my conversation with Raouiaa, the changes are happening in real time. Her mother supported the original family unit, did not question everything or “think that morality was stupid” (as Raouiaa put it).
A recurring theme in your work is giving up control. Why is control so central to modern womanhood, and what actually becomes possible when women loosen their grip on it?
“Control comes from fear. Control gives a person a sense of power. It comes from lack of trust. Basically, it comes from disconnection and not being in the flow. A disconnected person or woman needs to control a lot more than a connected person. It makes them feel powerful: to be in charge of their own destiny and to choose their own ways, providing a false sense of safety.”
Control is attached to an outcome: it micromanages from a place of survival of the fittest, and is birthed from the place of trauma. Control masks itself under the guises of trying to help, maintaining organization, and doing it all so others can relax (but it is truly acting from a place of selfishness). A controlling person seeks to dominate and uses power to advance personal agenda. She needs to know it all and believes she has all the answers. She needs to know the outcome in her own life, and what is going on in yours so that if it were to benefit her, she could jump in to help you: because controlling you makes her feel safe. If she can control everyone around her, she feels secure in her own chaos. Essentially a controlling woman is an internal mess.
What would a woman look like if she gave up her need to control?
When someone does not need to control, it brings an angelic beauty to the woman that touches everyone around her. That is the role of woman. To be that person. I know these women: they are present, and you can feel a sense of grounded safety within them radiating outward because they do not need to insert themselves into anyone else’s business. They are not thinking how to personally manage interactions for their benefit. A woman without the need to control has a deep trust within. She knows where she ends and another begins, and because of that she has no intention to connect to another with a secret agenda. Her integrity is palpable: she is authentic to her nature.
Feminine women allow—they do not control. They are not rigid, and they cannot be boxed in. Feminine women are fluid, they hold broad perspectives, see another person’s point of view, and do not fight change. If they ever become controlling, they are able to stop and observe themselves. The need to control limits every aspect of your life because you are repeating the past as you know it, and not accepting the present moment as it is. When life becomes rigid and planned, the present moment becomes unimportant and the present moment is your being. You can’t control the present moment.
Controlling people are very limited in their views of reality and this makes it hard for them to tap into spirituality, which is not three-dimensional; it exists far beyond anything that you can control within this realm. A feminine woman is spiritual, and she is intuitive. Intuition is a deep knowing that comes within the first eleven seconds of thought. It surpasses by far what the mind logically knows with its limiting thought forms. You cannot be both highly intuitive and highly controlling. One has no limits, and the other has many.
You explore uncomfortable dynamics, including how women can compete with one another through manipulation, victimhood, or approval-seeking. Why do you think these patterns persist—and how can women begin to interrupt them without shame?
Women have tried so hard for so many years to master male-centered goals, and this process has destroyed many of us, creating divorces, separating families, making us physically sick, mentally unwell, and emotionally drained or anxious. There is no quick fix to these issues. The only answer I have is to stop living in survival by acting like a man. Feminine women who are in their power and light are not desperate, manipulative, controlling, envious, competitive, or living from a sense of lack. There is no lack if you are comfortable with who you are and there is no competition if you are not trying to be something that you are not. If you are not trying to be a man, fighting your nature, these personality characteristics will cease to exist.
Lack of the feeling of success creates the states of desperation, jealousy, and competition. It puts you in the realm of the hungry ghosts: always greedily looking for something for fulfillment, but never feeling satisfied. This is because we need to redefine what success means and create a new ideology for society (specifically women in this case, because we are the pilots). Success is all about feeling and being content with who you are and what you have. If you do not know who you are, and you are constantly looking outside yourself to define that, you cannot be truly successful. I discuss the steps to finding the feeling of success and letting go of shame in detail in my book The Feminine Frequency.
People-pleasing is often framed as kindness. How do you distinguish between genuine care and self-abandonment, and what does moving beyond people-pleasing actually require?
If you are conditioned to please people, you are an easily manipulated individual: you must see your conditioning and act in an opposite manner in order to change the scenario. If somebody in your life is a terrible person: lies, manipulates, steals, is money grabbing, all of it! Why do you care to please this person? In this culture, we push for harmony, and we always try to keep everything at peace. We take charge to bring peace and not react. It’s alright to not to be at peace. It’s alright to be confrontational and say this is how I’m feeling, and this is what is happening: I don’t want to participate and if it keeps happening.
Again: If you are being manipulated, you hold the conditioning of being a people pleaser. If people feel they are entitled to take from you, what part of your personality feels satisfaction when you exceed expectations? If you always give and never receive, you may have been conditioned to be in codependent relationships and become self-sacrificing to receive love. Every relationship is a mirror, and you become the creator of your reality when you recognize this. If you are playing out the above dynamics, ask yourself: Why am I creating this and, most importantly, why am I participating in a relationship that does not feel harmonious? Here is one possible answer: It is because you are not in harmony within yourself, and you are not in your nature which is harmony.
The reason we want to please is because we care about how we are judged: so please stop caring how people judge you. You do not have to push for harmony with people that are unhealthy. If someone is not harmonious and they bring you harm, push them far away from you and do not let them manipulate your emotions. If you are in a relationship and know someone is taking advantage of you to get their needs met, then you are not being authentic. It is time to speak your truth to them.
You write about identity—mother, healer, professional, spiritual seeker—as both meaningful and limiting. How can women honor these roles without using them to fill deeper voids?
I want to tell you a little bit about this day-to-day life, both personally and professionally, so that you can see that it is possible to return to your nature and be in your heart, while still participating in a male-dominated world. I work two to three days a week on average in a clinic as a Family Nurse Practitioner, I write in my free time in the early mornings, I have a husband, three children, a doodle dog, properties that I care for, and autonomy as an American woman. I know that I am very blessed. In the past, I worked myself into total exhaustion at times to get to this place because my drive was so masculine. I have learned that I need a lot of help so that I do not function from a place of survival or desperation.
I had to go through a personal, and very spiritual, process, which I discussed in detail in my previous book, The Feminine Effect, to understand what the true nature of a woman is. As you can see, my life is full and active, but I strive for balance because I have seen, through the work with private clients around the world and as an author of books for women, how out of balance women have become. I am humble to criticism and open to changing my ways because I do not want to become sick physically and—most importantly—mentally.
I have seen what sickness in all forms is doing to women, particularly in my work in women’s health and reproductive medicine. Working in functional or integrative medicine has helped me understand how to get to the root of the problems and return to nature to heal them. All of these years of experience, and my own personal journey, have allowed me to see a different perspective when it comes to mental and physical health. I had to learn how to just exist and feel content with who I was authentically inside without any outside identities.
If everyone and everything were taken away from you, who would you be? Everything was taken away from me through my spiritual transformation, and I can tell you what I was left with: my true nature and authenticity.
Your personal journey spans extremes: poverty and wealth, addiction and healing, fear and joy. How did living at both ends of the spectrum shape your understanding of what truly nourishes women?
My core values keep me in my authenticity despite all the changes and challenges I have gone through in my life. The most important thing to me is my children. The core of who I am, and what I have always taught, relates to conscious motherhood. This is what I have learned:
The nature of the female, in its primal or original way of being, is to create a family unit. And when women are not in their feminine nature, the family system is broken, and they cannot relax into the joy of motherhood. There is a constant pressure to do more – to accomplish everything. Women have tried hard for so many years to master male-centered goals and this process has destroyed many of us, creating divorces, separating families, making us physically sick, mentally unwell, and emotionally drained or anxious.
There is no quick fix to these issues. The only answer I have is to stop living in survival by acting like a man and defining success through outward accomplishments. If you are now a mother, it is time to let some of your old identities go … they were created by society and may not feel authentic anymore. It is a time to embody your femininity, redefine what success means, and understand your nature as a woman.
Real success is knowing who you truly are, being content with that, and being content with what you have. Motherhood should be a time of feeling content with the biggest achievement of your life. Unfortunately, society has programmed us to believe that motherhood is not enough that you have to bounce back quickly to feel like you are keeping up. I am here to tell you that motherhood is the most powerful experience any woman can have, if she chooses to have it.
Feminine women who are in their power and light are not living in state of scarcity or unworthiness. They know how powerful their role is. There is no lack if you are comfortable with who you are and there is no competition if you are not trying to be something that you are not. If you are not trying to be a man, fighting your nature, these personality characteristics will cease to exist. You will see that the power of motherhood comes through raising conscious children, increasing your intuition, taking care of your family, and creating love and belonging for your community.
For a woman reading this who feels exhausted, disconnected, or unsure where she fits—what are tangible ways she can begin tuning back into her feminine frequency right now, without overhauling her life?
Connect to your authenticity.
“Most people refuse to be authentic. Because their authentic self is not acceptable by society or their conditioning. Because it is not acceptable, we adapt and adopt ways that we think is us, but it is not. When you are authentic, then nothing else has power over you or diminishes any of your power.”
Authentic women are very powerful women. They impact everything and everyone around them because they are in integrity. These individuals tell the truth. Authentic women are in touch with their emotions, and the feelings open their heart. They take accountability for their actions and are the same person in different scenarios because they do not hold a persona to make them better than anyone else. Authentic women do not manipulate their own emotions or wellbeing to please another person, because they are aware of the destruction that manipulation causes. They are not desperate to do something outside of their nature and there is no internal struggle when it comes to saying no. Society, social media, their parents: outside influences do not hold power over authentic women.
Connect to yourself, your intuition and feelings.
Stop following others: do not look to them to know what is right for you. All of the people that you follow, and try to keep up with, hold so many contaminations and identities. It is like the blind leading the blind, as they do not know themselves either. Find your identity as a woman and the value that you bring without all of these outward achievements. When you stop looking outside yourself for how to act or what to do, you will reconnect to what truly brings you joy. When you redefine success on your own terms, you will see very quickly that the people you once followed, who are holding onto their old identities, are actually miserable people. You will see through observation all of the things that take people out of their nature on a daily basis. Begin to allow feelings to guide your life. Let your happiness define what is right or wrong, not your logic. Take a breath and say to yourself: what do I feel? The main characteristic of woman is feeling. Credit your feelings more.
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