Welcome to The Mom Flow, where I share things that are on my mind in the hopes of helping you connect to your Mom Flow. Thanks for being here! —Erin Sousa
This was the week of big feelings. A lot of feelings because of a lot of challenges. I’ve mentioned before that Lola’s sleep has been really hard to navigate (any friends reading this: I know you’ve been getting an earful lately!) and in all honesty I’ve been struggling. The change to kindy has come with Lola’s need to simply, not go to sleep. Like, no matter what we do, she won’t sleep. Unless one of us sleeps with her… and that pretty much takes away our entire evening.
This week, we tried it “the hard way”… not giving in, and on Monday night, she was awake for 2.5 hours simply not settling. Screaming. Once she does finally fall asleep, she’s awake an hour later, at it again, until she makes her way into our bed. Roberto and I try to tag team, but nerves are frayed and it has created um, shall we say, fights. It’s not good, but there are many moments we turn on each other. I think everyone ended that night in tears. Sigh.
After that hard night this week, we both were majorly licking our wounds, both upset with each other and ourselves. Literally the worst feeling ever. Like waking up with an emotional hangover. Combined with a lot of other heavy things happening in the background, it made for a very rough next day. Both Roberto and I were raw. I wanted to retreat for a week. Here are some of the thoughts that were going through my head:
I am such a bad mom
I miss my little toddler
Am I traumatizing her?
When will this end?
Am I handling this all wrong?
Maybe I’m not cut out for this
Can I sleep for 6 days?
Well, the next day, we really needed a reset – some fun, some bonding, some recovery. So, instead of spending a stat holiday at my laptop, I joined dad and Lola at a fun play park and we just let loose! I said YES to the blue slushy and little trinkets. We didn’t rush. We lightened. The. F&ck. Up. Gosh, we needed it and it totally hit the reset button.
So, this is the lesson: when things feel super heavy, pour into your cups, loosen your grip, create that space whatever that looks like to you. It just so happened, bedtime that night was much smoother (although poetic, I’m calling coincidence).
A few more simple things giving the feel good vibes this week:
Shopping local – pouring into the community with things you need to buy feels great. I know how hard owning a business is and we can’t just let them evaporate!
Lighting candles – ok ok, I know this is so basic, but I forget how lovely it is to enjoy the smell and vibe of a really good candle (current faves: ROAM and use ERIN20 to shop). I especially love one in the bathroom while hosting.
Cozy meals – hosted a girls night and made the coziest Chicken Pot Pie (breaking out my Dutch oven is a love language!). Use any good recipe like this, but skip the pastry on top and cook the pasty separately, placing it on top of a full bowl of your ‘stew’. I like it because the pastry stays crispy!
A little reminder that we can choose to deal with those big feelings in a healthy way and we have the power to shift our feelings and mindset. Another reminder that feelings are fleeting, and even the most intense ones dissipate faster than you think they might.
There’s more! Keep reading this week’s edition of The Mom Flow by Erin Sousa; subscribe for free to receive new posts and support her work, here!
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